Foo Fighters, Everlong and Running as a Creative Impulse

Regular readers of the Morning Shakeout email presented by Mario Fraioli and his friends at Tracksmith® are well aware of his habit of sharing links to musical performances or running related video content. This week the link connected you to the intriguing journey of running influencer Casey Neistat standing atop the literal and figurative mountain of going sub-3 hours in the marathon.

Validating the algorithm is irresistible, nestled in the dancing thumbnail suggestions was a live performance of the always immaculate Foo Fighters and their 2008 performance at world renown Wembley Stadium, London. That bad boy was clicked and I was lost for 45 minutes after logging out of my remote work setup.

Fooies (Did I make that up?) are well aware that the ageless fount of youth that is beloved front man Dave Grohl and associates close their shows with the earworm anthem Everlong. I’d never personally sampled this performance though I was aware of the documentary detailing this concert in it’s entirety. No one can accuse me of being a huge Foo Fighters guy but, I can say the volume turned up when their stuff came on the alternative radio station in high school.

That night in Wembley, the band bade the 90k in attendance a fond ado by turning over their well warn classic to reveal an almost introspective atmosphere. During that dramatic lull before the final build up, Dave looked into the swelling masses and proceeded to tear down the proverbial house. I was blown away and emotional in ways that only a magical music performance can conger.

As has been the case for my nearly three decades, plus, in running, music immediately transported me to my experiences on the roads, trails and races across the country. TBH I can’t clap on beat or carry a tune with a bucket. Other than for those that run, I share little in common with the creativity of the musical artist. Yet for me, the effort of running has always satisfied the creative impulse. The need to make something from nothing via kCals and the Krebs cycle.

In summer, winter, joy, pain, bliss, loss and confusion running has created a venue for my mind to make something with my body the way I can infer music does for a musician. Cute, right? So what about Dave and friends?

On that night, in 2008, Dave Grohl, as close to modern, living rock legend as you can find, created something new out of something old. I’d venture Foo Fighters has performed that song over 5000 times, in concert alone. There is a likelihood they could play it in their sleep and parts of four decades performing it live has taken the original emotion from it’s current life. Not on that night. Not on Dave’s watch. Everlong he waited for that unknown someone and something as good as it gets, but the experience lives on like it was yesterday.

In a Minneapolis suburb, later this afternoon, I’ll put on some Atreyu trainers (if punk rock was a running shoe company) and catch a run. Not the same run I started four decades ago, but the same impulse. Not to win, compete, or transcend. To create, to be and I’ll wonder with every past version of myself and the miles accumulated over the years:

“If everything could ever feel this real forever? If anything could ever be this good again?”

Thanks, Dave. Indeed they can.

If you like delicious things CLICK HERE to watch the performance and may the algorithm be with you.

Finding The Pace at a New Distance

For the likely small group of folks that will end up at this page, I appreciate your taking a moment to consider my thoughts. As often happens to people as they reach a different stage of life, waking up one day disoriented by the current state of affairs has been my experience for most of the last two years. If there are a small number of eyes that will see this page, there’s an even smaller number who will have any concern for the minutia that created that sensation so I we’ll just move along to the hopeful reason I’ve decided to revive an archaic medium and post on my dormant blog. It’s time to learn how to run again.

In the largest portion of the last 20 years I worked as a head cross country and/or lead distance event track & field coach, mostly in the NCAA Division III level. It was a life I greatly enjoyed and the rhythm of a college or high school competition season was the sundial that oriented my annual calendar. For the sake of brevity, all that is necessary to state here is, my leaving that world was not my choice and I fought to stay with all I had left in a very tired soul. Nothing illegal or otherwise immoral happened. One day, I answered a phone call and was informed I did not have a job. No situation is ever as simple as the likely millions of others who have experienced that type of scenario would confirm. This isn’t a tragedy, it’s merely a harsh reality that crushed a part of me that I’m not sure will ever fully recover.

Life moves on. Things evolve. Your place in the world changes. You are, for how ever long you are. Then you are not.

Except, that’s not true for me. I will always be.

Coach.

A group of really kind people that care deeply about my alma mater put me in their hall of fame for being a coach. (You can read about that elsewhere on this site) The relationships and experiences required to accomplish the kinds things that qualify a person for that type of honor impact you for your entire life. A phone call cannot change that about life.

For a solid year I stumbled around, disoriented with no practice times on my schedule. No recruiting calls. No conference or national honor rolls to sift through on long Saturday night bus rides or over Sunday morning coffee. Pockets devoid of receipts for travel expenses. A job where no one knew what a shoe being “super” means. Over 12 months of realizing I lived in a niche world for almost two decades that no longer had a place for me.

Then it happened that an old friend and former colleague reached out about a job opportunity for which I may be qualified. 20 days later I had a new job making significantly more than I ever had in my life. It is very much not a coaching position. The work is good and meaningful and it does help student athletes.

Within a few months after that a few former college runners I’d worked with asked about marathon training and I’ve set out working with them to improve their experience in that endeavor…We message several times a week…A former coaching colleague new to being a high school AD reached out to see if I could help her very overworked cross country coach with their growing program…I was back at cross country practice as if it was my freshman year all over again.

So what then…when you continue existing after something very powerful in your life goes away? Well for me I do what I’ve always done since I found running 25 years ago, I went for a run.

I’m training, now. For a 33 mile fundraiser run you can learn more about in my social media accounts.

This is life in a new stage. I’m still a bit disoriented but I’m figuring out how to dream while also being present-tense. So there is learning the tactics of a new race, a new pacing, a new venue. There is strength in learning to hope again. My new hope is I can encourage you, a coach in your corner of sorts.

I did not start running to win a conference title. I did not start coaching to win an NCAA title. But I’m unwilling to forgo my naïve belief that the best path to achieve those goals is focusing on the quality of the path itself. The work is purifying and holy. It’s worth every step if motives are right. Holding on to that thought, I’m running again to see what’s possible, as George Sheehan once said, on the other side of sweat.

Honor and Gratitude Beyond Measure From an Unlikely Hall of Famer

On Thursday evening, May 5th I had the distinct honor and humbling privilege of being named into my alma mater, North Central University’s athletics hall of fame. For me it was special because it gave me a platform to bestow honor upon and gratitude for so many important people in my life and the student athletes I’ve partnered with over the years. I’m including the text from my speech here because the majority of those I spoke of were unable to attend in person. It’s long and winding but is the list of people that have impacted my very fortunate life. If I am a hall of fame worthy coach and former athlete, then every person mentioned here stands next to me in that honor. Thanks for taking a moment to read and share in one of the greatest honors I have and will ever receive.

First on the list of thanks and gratitude today is my mom and dad your incredible faithfulness is a legacy, I first experienced God’s love by experiencing your love. Dad, I’m so glad you’re still here to hear these words. To my high school track coach Tom Durbin, you planted the seed of running almost 30 years ago and I’m here today because you cared for clumsy kid that FINALLY broke 5 minutes in the mile!

Next, I am forever grateful to my coach, mentor and friend, Greg Hayton who I’ll same more about in a moment.  I won’t forget former assistant athletic director Cedric Jones for launching my dream career in college athletics as a student worker.  Thanks to former VP of Student Development, Mike Nosser, who along with Coach Hayton, believed in me enough to make me the head coach at NCU in 2006. I would also like to thank former AD Jake Smith for his great friendship, leadership and support along the way.

Thanks to my assistant coaches Drew Clapp, Tim Austin, Dave Mowers, Tony Lehr, Bree Williamson, Kara Hurst, Catherine Winkelman, David Calhoun, Kelsey Daggett and Jimmy Hultengren, Brian & Sarah Lee, Matt Haskins and Jenny Hitchcock thank you for standing with me as we served student-athletes on the cross country and track teams.

Thanks to support staff who helped and encouraged me as I cared for the student-athletes at NCU. Fellow coaches and staff Allison Meadows, Kenny Flermoen, Steph Schmidt, Megan Kaczmarek, Andrew Cameron, Daved Lundeen, Lon Flippo, Paul Brunner, Justin Brown and Faith Ooms. And thanks for the unique and important contributions of athletic trainers Amara Kelly Sing Pamperin, Karmen Voigt and the inestimable Dr. Tom Smith, ATC.

I have saved a special spot for five people in this list of gratitude and thanks. First, Troy Pearson, a former AD/SID/Facilities Coord/Coach and 2000 point scorer with nearly 1000 rebounds in his account for NCU basketball. Many will never know the things he did for NCBC athletics or his university. He is a servant of the highest degree. His vision is one of the truly original voices for NCU becoming a DIII school. His own stats and many of those he coached are still near the tops of NCU records books. His care for our records, our school and my path at NCU are still felt today.

Then to my sister in Christ, running and eating olive garden never ending salad & bread sticks at one specific location in Rockford, Ill., Michelle Beichley-Sieh. You were an encouragement and support in ways that are hard to explain. You were the OG woman’s distance athlete at NCU that first believed it could be done and then went and did the thing. The success of the LONG list of women who went on to follow in your footsteps as all-conference, conference champs, all-americans and national champions is, in my humble and openly biased opinion the GREATEST athletics legacy in the history of NCU athletics outside of our coach Greg Hayton.

I also must include Blake Johnson, what incredible talent and heart we inherited when God called you to NCU from Kearney. You showed us all that you could be fully dedicated to the sport while also being faithful to God’s calling in other areas. The races you won, the times you posted were truly legendary. That 5k/10k double vs. Sergio Reyes remains the most impressive performance I’ve ever seen in person by a teammate or athlete I’ve coached, courage doesn’t begin to describe what you did on those two days. I was never your equal in speed, but I worked so hard to help our guys run fast so your legacy would never be forgotten on or off the trails.

I’ll put these next two in one pairing. Catherine Mead Winkleman and Daniel Bare. Their names at the top of the NCU records books today is an actual footnote to a greater life story. They are incredible spouses’ parents and people of Christ like faith. I hear of and see them loving their spouses (also NCU runnin rams!), serving their communities and raising children to know and love Christ. It’s all very humbling to know I shared life with these people. Daniel, you my friend forced me to believe we could do it together and finally bring home a banner from Ohio. Then you went and erased every record and broke ever barrier there was on the way to greatness. Catherine, people stopped believing in you when you got hurt in HS and NCU inherited an untapped talent that was beyond what anyone could have known. Then you went out and dominated in your sport the way few if any have ever done in the history of NCU athletics. I don’t know if there is a way to say who the greatest athlete in school history is, but I know this NO ONE in NCU history was better in their sport than you. PERIOD.

Troy Pearson, Michelle Sieh, Blake Johnson, Catherine Mead and Daniel Bare should all be in the NCU Athletics Hall of Fame very soon.

Next, to the men and women of NCU cross country and track & field I was privileged to lead. We accomplished so much so together, and, to me, you will always be far more than just a GPA number or one line on a results page or records book. I love you all like you are a member of my family. If I am in an NCU athletics hall of fame, in my estimation every one of you is in that company as well. Your legacy lives and breathes in my life every day.

Finally I want to mention five other names, the first group of men in NCU history who posted a xc team score my teammates: Todd Fayta, Drew Clapp, Marcus Madson and Matt Hayton. We added Matt Gardner by the end of the year. You guys started it all. You’re legends. I stand here today receiving an honor that is equal parts yours.

Today is special to me, not because I get an award, but because I truly believe this an honor recognizing every one of the athletes I worked with. It is also incredibly special because I get to share the moment with Jon and Jamie High. God used the High family to bless my family beyond what can be explained in my brief opportunity here. Jamie, you were an incredible athletic talent. I entered the stats into the NCU records books for every one of your then school records and even did live stream play by play for many of the games. But that is so secondary to what you gave to our family caring for my son when he was a baby. Seeing you two grow up together, him from infant to toddler, you from young woman to adult was a tremendous blessing. I have no doubt his love of reading was in part, thanks to you. Coach High, what a God ordained chance that our careers and families crossed paths. I got to see your amazing kids absolutely crush it in hoops and rewrite NCU records books. I got to see you take the lead in us moving forward to full DIII membership. It was awesome to see you take your team to the brink of a UMAC title and become a force in NCCAA DII. But the impact was great in seeing you lead your family, first as the kids were still in HS and leading in morning devotions, then as they became athletes at NCU. You also valued my unique gifts and talents and encouraged me when many others would have been skeptical the role an SID/XC coach could have in a program. Your care for my spirit will leave an impact for the rest of my life. I also need to mention someone very special to my family, your wife Amy. No one knows what it’s like to be a coach’s wife AND have your kids on that team unless they’ve lived it. Your grace and love for everyone was incredible. Then you went above and beyond and adopted my son and wife as members of your family too. Quade is so blessed to have you in his life. Amy, you’re a hall of famer, too.

Almost 25 years ago a young guy, a guy about the same age I am today, saw me wearing a HS letter jacket (he swears it was full of medals, it actually had one) outside the CLC classrooms and recruited me to join the brand-new track program to be started in spring 2000. The rest is history and I have so much I could say about today that in respect of time cannot. Coach Hayton gave me an opportunity, part time after graduation to help with the initial data collection for application to DIII and to help coach xc/tf program. In the meantime, he made me part of his family. He opened his home to me throughout college and for my teams afterward. His home was the first place my first son visited after coming home from the hospital. No one outside my own father, grandmother and wife have impacted my life more than Greg Hayton. I’m glad he’s already in this hall of fame or I would have had to turn down this honor until he was rightfully added. Greg Hayton did not start NCU athletics, he is not an NCU alumni, and he never played for a team here, though he did coach just about every team for at least a few competitions. All but 4 NCU athletics programs were started by Coach Hayton. NO ONE is more impactful in the history of Rams athletics than Coach. When you consider the hundreds of student athletes and students in the education department that he’s worked with over the last 30 years, it’s impossible to number and the impact will last generations. I love you Coach, I’m so thankful you’re here with me today. My honor today, is certainly yours to share as well. We did it, coach, we did it! 14 national champs, impossible numbers of all americans and yet it feels secondary to the relationships that have stood the test of time, forged by sweat and tears and the Holy Spirit (and subway sandwiches, lots of subway).

To my wife, Allison, you’re my hero. I love you, there is no one else I’d rather share this day with than you and the boys. All of this means so much because I have you to share it with.

I could say more than time allows in gratitude for my opportunity to be a Ram. 25 years ago, I came to NCU. A nerdy, 18 yo sports stats, geek unsure of where I fit in God’s kingdom but full of hope that he could use me somehow. A few months ago, when Katie DeWitt called me to ask if I’d accept this honor, it was a surreal moment. It’s still strange to me when I look at it from the perspective of the young man that came to NCU three decades ago. There was no path for that naïve young man to ever see himself in a college athletics hall of fame. I’ve been able to think about what I’d say at this ceremony a lot since then, and it was, as I hope is clear, important for me to acknowledge all the Godly people put I my path. He’s also put on my this on my heart and maybe some on needs to hear it, former athlete or someone in the room.

A brief story from one our cross country championship seasons: I’ll never forget, moments after the race had ended at nationals and it was clear that the women were going to earn their 6th consecutive win, the championship event director from the NCCAA asked me as I was walking back from my spot along the final finish stretch to meet the team in the chute, if I thought we could win it for eight  straight years, the longest streak for any nccaa sport. We hadn’t even received the banner or all-america plaques and people were already moving on to the next season.

The satisfaction from winning is so fleeting. Very few in this room could name a single person from our first championship in 2005. And that’s the way it goes with sports. The luster of our wins and trophies gather dust. Names are forgotten and time erodes the glories of our youth. So why is NCU experience so meaningful to me if I know it to be true about those wins, awards and accomplishments?

Because the fruit of the spirit isn’t a championship banner or breaking the school record. The fruit of the spirit isn’t something I or my fellow running rams DID. Fruit of the spirit is something the holy spirit produced in us. And that fruit wasn’t winning anything. The idea of “proof of concept” is popular in coaching right now, the idea your athletes and coaches need to see something work to prove it’s validity. I’m fulfilled by my athletic and professional experience at NCU because God used it to produce the fruit of the spirit in my life and that of those around me. And that is, to me, proof of concept.

We have to get up and physically do things. Training is the trellis that structures our growth as athletes. As believers training is the trellis that structures our growth in the spirit. A trellis gives form and shape so that vines can grow in productive and healthy ways and limbs can be carefully pruned even when it’s hard. NCU athletics and the Xc/tf program were a trellis for the lives of men and women to act in ways that allowed the spirit to produce fruit. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. That is proof of concept and it is still active in the lives of our former athletes, translating the gospel in Sengal, Chi alpha ministers at UW Milwaukee and Tulane, international student ministry at the U of M, teaching school all over the country, delivering the mail in small town Wisconsin, parenting children in the ways of Christ, serving in Church bodies coast to coast, some even coaching high school teams.

I’m very thankful the teams I worked with were able to achieve some very cool things competitively. I wouldn’t be here to receive this type of honor without those successes. But years later, the thing that resonates most is the friendships, relationships, and experiences that were seeds that are bearing fruit. It’s the more excellent way we wanted to do things. We put it on our warm-up shirts that said “Be eXCellent”. It’s the way that’s talked about at the end of 1 Corinthians 12 before the talk about love in chapter 13. And excellence isn’t simply an outcome, it’s way of life that produces good fruit. We didn’t always get it completely right and we unashamedly cared an awful lot about winning. My heart will always be that of a 20 year old on the river road putting in endless miles in search of a few extra seconds off my results.

Yet as I think back about what was most meaningful, it’s the faith, hope and love we experienced together. The greatest of course, was the fruit of the spirit called love and that love remains long after the winning is forgotten. Thank you all, God bless and GO RAMS.